More Helping, Less Arguing

To parents of kids with Asperger’s or autism:
We can’t in one breath tell the world how horrible our lives and our children’s lives are because they have autism, then in the next tell our children that they are wonderful and shouldn’t feel bad about having autism. They won’t believe us.

To people with Asperger’s or autism:
You can’t tell parents of children with autism that your lives are really hard, that no one understands or accepts you, and that NTs/allistics are mean to you, then tell parents they shouldn’t try to fix or cure their child. They don’t want their children to suffer what you tell them is a horrible life.

Debating whether people with autism should be cured and if so, who should make that decision, (people with autism or the parents of people with autism), is a wonderful pastime, but at this point purely academic. As of now, no cure exists. However, there are a lot of people who have autism now who could use help learning how to survive in a society that is not prepared to accommodate them. More helping and less arguing would be nice.

Demanding that society is nice to people with disabilities (or working toward that cause) is wonderful and blessings on those who do it. Every person they convince is one more person who will help make the lives of people with autism easier. But believing that all of society will change is ignoring human nature. Please don’t let your passion to change society take precedence over teaching children in your care who have autism how to become as independent, capable, safe, and happy as possible.

Each of us has a limited amount of time and energy we can spend on autism. Let’s put those resources where they will do the most good.

– Cassie
PS. If you think this is helpful, pass it on to someone else.


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